suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
