Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
