You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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