I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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