I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
