At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize