The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
