Whod you bang
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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