Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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