SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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