i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Randomize
