He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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