Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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