Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
In America we eat man semen.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
