There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
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