i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
