did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I bet he comes in French.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
