i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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