so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
