So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
