Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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