East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
