"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
