3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize
