I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I pour the whiskey from now on
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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