Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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