One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Girls should come with a carfax report
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Randomize