Ambien. No doubt about it.
I will die if light touches me.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
