there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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