just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
