absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Randomize
