Me. At least after what I've been through.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Randomize
