Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Randomize
