Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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