That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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