i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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