Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
