I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Randomize
