I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
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