I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
