he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
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