Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
