woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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