I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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