Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
