That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize