All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
i dont even know how to be here
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
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