i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
