so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
