Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Randomize
