I wish i was in the wii world.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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